Let me start with the disclaimer---I love Africa. I ached to come for ages and I know GOD sent us here. But lately, I feel weary of it.
I am tired of...
* everyone asking me for money.
* explaining and repeating and repeating...and repeating instructions and when the work is done...it's still wrong.
* having nowhere to go for fun. (That's not exaggerating.) There aren't any parks, playgrounds, bike trails or even one single fast food restaurant in all of Conakry.
* our family jumping from one illness to another.
* slow internet (i miss youtube)
* buying everything online
* mice and lice
* did I mention trash
* crazy expensive prices (think 60 dollars for a pound of cheese)
* being cheated at the market...or at least the attempt to.
* my uncut, uncolored hair.
* having no place to drive to when I am angry and just want to be alone.
* not driving at all...having to rely on drivers to go anywhere
This is how I feel...but as I've been learning lately in Ephesians--the reality is that I am blessed with every spiritual blessing. So even though these are frustrating parts of life in Africa, I can know that in the midst of them, I am lavished with blessing from my FATHER...not in spite of them but in them!
This is where it matters: Believing HIM, I mean. It's easy to believe that I am blessed when I have scenic places to walk with my family, healthy kids, plenty of activity and our family all around us. But if I believe it then and don't believe it now then obviously I equated blessing with my circumstance.
GOD is way too cool to let our blessing be circumstances! Sometimes we see it in them, to be sure. But ultimately, GOD wants to bless us with permanent and lasting things---even if it means I can't actually see them right now.
So..I'm OK with weary and tired...and even with trash. Because I am blessed with every spiritual blessing. I am seated with JESUS!
and from those seats...things look pretty good!